Grace and Redemption

Pressing On

This week in class one of my professors shared that she is going to visit family for Thanksgiving and praying for the Lord to help her and giver her strength because her sister has Alzheimer's and will not remember her. Another one of my professors with tears in her eyes asked us to pray for her family because her sister-in-law has been diagnosed with cancer and has lost all of her hair and her son is angry and won't talk to anyone. This has been one of the hardest weeks all semester. I am in such a sweet season of life but one that is full of hardships, and testing. This week I cried out to God and said "Lord this is to much." What's to much? Everything. School, finances, family stress, relationships, loosing friends from home, watching my professors suffer from cancer, death, sickness, and pain, staying up until 3 a.m. to finish assignments, and feeling crushed by the weight of the tragedy happening in our world. I have felt so heavy and so numb. As I was praying "Jesus I need you." The Holy Spirit said to me, "Do you need Jesus so He can fix everything so you will feel better, or do you need Him because He is Jesus?" I sat in silence as I was sharply convicted. "Jesus doesn't just want to fix your situations Sofia, He wants to be the essence of your life and breath." Ugh. Why Holy Spirit? Why say this now while I am hurting and so overwhelmed by the things around me that I feel like I have lost control and am drowning in a sea of pain. When everything is going great it is so easy for me to say Jesus I need you, not just to fix my problems but simply because I love you. But when I feel as if I'm in the midst of a raging storm it is harder to say Jesus I need you because you are my life and easier to say Jesus I need you to come and fix all of this pain and mess I am in. I was listening to In Over My Head by Bethel and these lyrics stood out to me "Whether I sink, whether I swim, It makes no difference when I'm beautifully in over my head." I am no longer on the shores I have been plunged into the deep waters and Jesus says "Stop fighting it, you are in over your head just where I want you to be." No this doesn't mean we are defeated. It means that now we have surrendered control and given it to Jesus that His victory would sweep in, crush Satan, and set us free. But our freedom is found in surrender. The more trials that I go through, the more that I realize this. Life is too hard. Pain can be unbearable. Fear can kill you. College can be one of the hardest processes. But Jesus is greater. We are going to go through so much in this life. We are going to get beaten up on, hurt, pushed down, talked about, and left behind. But Jesus is greater. And at the end of our fight we will come face to face with the victor Himself. Today I was encouraged to stop sitting on my God given dreams because of the fear of pain and the unknown. But to rise up and fight against the kingdom of darkness and proclaim the truth that Jesus Christ has won. If you're going through it know that you're not alone and that this battle you are in right now may be banging you up and wearing you out but it is producing within you an anointing that is sending the devil on the run and unleashing victory, Don't give up God is not finished with you yet.
-Sofia

Stop Playing Games With The Enemy