Trusting Him in Emptiness.

I have to be honest, I feel like I need to be ministered to more than I need to minister in this particular moment. I feel like I've been so poured out that my cup of offering is empty. I think we all have these different times in our lives when life seems to constantly be against us. Everyday it's something different and by the end of the week we find ourselves with all of these things stacked against us. Times like this leave me in a place of brokenness. Having a mandate to be in full time ministry is hard but I think learning to trust God to fill you up when your empty is harder. "I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint. My heart has turned to wax; it has melted away within me." -Psalm 22:14  Trusting God to come in and bring restoration through His power and love when we feel like this cry of David is hard. Actually it's more than hard, it can seem unbearable sometimes. As I continue reading through this scripture though I see that David continues to praise God and declare His goodness over the nations. David stays in this posture of worship even when He is under so much torment that he feels as if his heart has melted away. He then comes to the revelation of "You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows."- Psalm 23:5.  How do we go from "I am poured out like water," to "my cup overflows." I don't have the answer to this and it's hard to discern what it might be while you're in the thick of things, but I do know that David never stopped worshiping. Even while he was in the middle of physical and spiritual affliction beyond belief he continued to worship. And somehow out of that sacrificial worship David went from being poured out like water, and crushed down, to overflowing with anointing. He came to this mighty revelation that God has purposed things in His life that the enemy can not stop. I'm hearing God say that He wants me to trust Him with EVERYTHING I have. He wants me to trust Him with all of my life, with all of my heart, with all of my things. He wants me to lay it all down at His feet and walk even if I don't know where I'm walking. It's times like this in life where your faith is really tested and where you really have to say "Okay Jesus I can't see but I know you can." I really just wanted to come from a place of vulnerability with you guys today. Life isn't perfect and it's most definitely not easy. I think we become ineffective in ministry if we are only willing to share the good things with people.We have to be willing to share the hard parts of life, and show people that we don't have everything together. Sometimes when people ask you how you're doing you need to be truthful and say how you're really feeling. That's what I'm doing now. I just want to minister today to the heart that is hurting because I know what it's like to have a hurting heart. A word of encouragement is this "I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him for that day." - 2 Timothy 1:12. I have entrusted Jesus with my life, my heart, and with the people that enter into it, and I know that He is able to guard it ALL. I know that my Redeemer lives, even if I don't feel like it. And I know that Satan is defeated and that my head is anointed with oil. The Holy Spirit has the power and I will continue to say "Jesus I trust you." even when I am pressed in on every side. Praying for restoration and victory for your guys lives!- Sofia